Friday, April 13, 2012

The FINAL Quarter with the COACH.....

I thought that it would be a friendship to last until the end of time; a friendship that could possibly blossom to a fulfilling relationship; a friendship that I would cherish forever….BOY, I was wrong.  Let me first start by saying that I am so thankful for the friendship and experience; I don’t know if it’s one that I would like to have again, but it surely taught me something.  Here’s the thing:  I lived in a fantasy world; I wanted something that I clearly couldn’t have.  No, I’m not talking about him being married, having a girlfriend, or anything of that nature; I mean he might not have been emotionally ready.  To be honest, I have battling for a while to even write the words…doesn’t it seem like when you see them on paper, they tend to become more of a reality. 

Take for instance, “Just Wright”(the movie)…remember in the beginning when Leslie (Queen Latifah’s character) went out on a date with Mark Matthews ( Laz Alonso’s character) and everything seemed to be going GREAT…until she mentioned the magical words…”Let’s hang out again”.  He quickly shot out, “I’m not emotional ready” and “You’re good people”, when just moments ago, he was feeding her off of his fork and showing her quite a bit of emotions. WAIT. For a while, I have mirrored my life as me being Leslie Wright because of Mr. Game Plan; thinking that my Mr. Wrong had to surely come first in order for Mr. Game Plan, ie “Scott McKnight”, to take notice later down the road…and you see where that got me.  Now, here, a year later and it looks like Coach has become Mark Matthews; how did this even happen?  Where was I when all of this was going on?  Did I really live in “la la” land this WHOLE TIME????  Dang it…UGH! RESUME. 

My mind is so confused, I am struggling for words to even discuss this; how could I have not seen the signs?  I know….BECAUSE THEY WERE IN FRONT OF MY EYES, YET HIDDEN.  Okay, so you ask how can that be so; well, I saw what I wanted.  I have always heard people say “Actions speak louder than words”…a statement that I lived by until now.  He was attentive and caring, a man’s man; he was all that I felt that I needed and wanted in a guy…yet, he TOLD me that he wanted to take things slow and have a friendship…BUT he showed signs that he really liked me.  WAIT.  It looks like I READ WAY TOO MUCH into the actions…dang relationship advice…*shakes my head*. RESUME.   My emotions have gotten the best of me; I have pondered, debated, questioned, and challenged our last conversation together.  I may never fully understand why I wasn’t the top pick for the Coach; 9 times out of 10, I’m not supposed to know.  I truly believe that God gave me the desires of my heart for a reason; He placed the Coach in my life to show me that there are some good men out there, with qualities that I need and even want…however, the Coach wasn’t meant for me.  Whenever we have doubt about what God can do, He will show you that He is still in control.  To say that my faith in being found by real love is restored is an UNDERSTATEMENT; I fully believe that Mr. Right will be “Just Wright” for me….

So, before I end this emotional piece, I have compiled a list of things to remember when your “Mr. Right Now” doesn’t choose you:
1.       Believe that God has a better plan for your life…The Coach wasn’t the one for me, but he taught me to never be anyone that I am not.  If I had done anything differently with the Coach, I wouldn’t have been true to myself or him.  Meeting and dating him was NOT by mistake, nor was it a mistake.
2.       Continue to build your brand…Brands, to me, are movements that impact lives; the best brand to build is yourself.  Each day, we have to show and sell our brand to those we met; some will invest and others will walk away…but guess what:  There will be that one person that will be committed to investing a LIFETIME in your brand, so continuing developing the brand that God has given you.
3.       LIVE, LAUGH, and LOVE….I have said this once before, but LIVE life to the fullest, LAUGH even when you can’t, and LOVE with no regret (okay, so maybe those aren’t the exact words I said before, but you get the drift…LOL).
4.       Dust your feet off and get back to dating…I won’t allow this one unique experience to stop me from my dating life; 6 months is a long time to know someone, and I just have to store those 6 months in a different file and start a new folder.  If I ever write a book, this chapter would be called, “My Like Affair with the Coach”
5.       Make a playlist of songs that will get you through….My playlist had sad songs, anthems, and gospel tracks.  Here is a brief list of some songs that I had (and sometimes still do) on REPEAT:
a.       “Rolling in the Deep”-Adele
b.      “I Was Here”-Beyonce
c.       “I’ve Been That Girl” & “Break Down These Walls”-Melanie Fiona
d.      “Hurts Like Hell”-Aretha Franklin
e.      “My Testimony” Marvin Sapp
f.        “Thing Called Us”-Hamilton Park
g.       “Good Enough”-Jazmine Sullivan
h.      “Just The Lonely Talking Again”-Whitney Houston
i.        “Great is Your Mercy”-Donnie McClurkin
j.        “Climax”-Usher
k.       “Will I Ever”-Lyfe Jennings

this creole guillory is awaiting to write the next chapter; this time, i will make sure to allow God to be the author and i’ll be the co-author

Monday, April 2, 2012

My 1st "Anny"....

On the way back home to Louisiana, I began to think back to a year ago; during that time, I was faced with a smart decision to start my own blog…in the beginning, I didn’t know what I would write about or how often I would write.  I just knew I wanted to get my emotions and thoughts out for the world to see.  I wasn’t sure where my words would take me, but I am so thankful I decided to call myself a “blogger”.  Within a year’s time, I have embarked upon so many great people, opportunities, and challenges; I pushed myself to higher heights and fought great fights.  I can honestly say that I am a better person because of my first post; since March 29, 2011, here are some of my adventures….
1.       I FINALLY said goodbye to my EX of 5 years….He was the main reason that I started the blog; I just knew I was ready for a change and by venting about him, I began to realize what great potential I had.  Thanks T. Murphy for telling me to my face that you never really loved me; had it not been for that moment, I would have NEVER considered my own playground called “the creole soul of a guillory”.
2.       I have a recurring feature in an online magazine….Writing for a magazine is a HUGE deal for me; back in high school, I knew that I loved to write.  My life coach gave me the inspiration to put my work out there and pursue my passion for writing.  As of today, I have pitched my blog to 3 different online magazines throughout the US; I write for one of them, while another one is reviewing/considering me.  The local online magazine editor stated that he loved my work, but there wasn’t a section fit for me at the time…it’s okay though, I have to start somewhere and I don’t plan to stop!
3.       I explored the WORLD OF DATING… Listen, I was surprised by the emotions and challenges of dating.  Valuable lessons were learned throughout this last year; lessons that I have written about in my blog.  Memorable lessons would include: “If a guy tells you, in so many words, that he doesn’t want a relationship with you, BELIEVE HIM!”, “Taking it slow is always a great step, while never forgetting to LOVE YOURSELF”, or “Take a risk at relationships; you NEVER know what is ahead of you”.  Sad to say, but my dating record doesn’t look to bright right now, but I am okay with that…the right guy will surely come along when I least expect it; until then, I will SMILE and be SINGLE.
4.       The famous “Things that Men Say” list was created… Doc is one of my best friends, while being family; our girl talk is the highlight of my weeks.  We tend to have certain “spots” that we visit for dinner, thus creating the list.  Trust me, this list COULD NOT be made up…all are true experiences that women have been through.  Each time I read the lists, I break down and cry from laughter; if you haven’t read them, I suggest you find them on the blog and get yourself a laugh J
5.       I lost my Paw Paw, celebrated the life of my best friend(Ms. Terrye), got a new position, started a new girls youth organization, moved into a new place, began to attend Sunday School, and introduced a new chapter into my book called Life... Yeah, that was a lot in one year; I can’t believe I experienced all of that, plus more.  Each day produced new challenges and I wouldn’t change any of it….

So, there you have it; a year jammed pack with more adventures to last some a lifetime…BUT NOT ME!  I’m just getting started.  I am so thankful for the many blessings that God has given to me and those around me…I have a great support system and a loving fan base…I thank you all for always sharing in my life with me.  Within a year, I have had thousands of views of my work; it just motivates me to push harder in the next year.  Trust me, there will be more “Things Men/Women Say” lists, overview of LC Homecomings, Chapters of Dating(I think…lol), and much much more!  Words will never express how I feel having the title “blogger”…I hope you continue on the ride, because I promise I will be right there with you for the entire journey…Until March 2013 for my next yearly update!