Monday, December 5, 2016

To CRUSH or not to CRUSH about Second Chances...

In life, we aren't always awarded the opportunity to have a second chance. For some, a second chance is the moment of proving ones self again, making sure to tackle the learning curve balls you were tossed; for others, it's just another chance to screw up. For my crush, I'm getting more than a second chance...to finally move forward because he's getting the second chance to mend a broken love and renew golden moments. The many times that it didn't quite "connect" for us confused me, mainly because I just knew that I'd finally get a chance to prove myself...but God has another path. Three times, I watched a man I admired and crushed on to lay his feet at the doorstep of other women and I couldn't do anything about it. Each time, I was the eager friend that consoled his emotions and placed his manhood back in check. The encourager; the listener; the comforter - that was ALL me. I allowed my crush for him to overpower the fact that I played a role I wasn't created for. Who knew that this man would never be my soulmate, connector or forever lover? Obviously, not me...not then! 

From the first date (Cheap priced drinks with reasonable entrees...and croissants that melt in your mouth) to the first road trip (He had me in "California" while cruising the mean streets of Dallas, TX), I cherished all of our personal moments - it taught me something about relationships. Relationships can't be driven by a "one-way" mindset...two lanes are more than sufficient to connect yourselves together for some common goal - LOVE. My crush helped me to realize that I can no longer absorb fantasy land...I must get back on my side of the road and wait for the construction process to be complete. He's decided on the two lane highway that's best for him and I couldn't be more than happy for him - probably one of his biggest cheerleaders. Nothing was wrong with me, him or even us; we just weren't meant to travel in the world called LOVE together. Will our paths ever cross again? Will we ever speak like before? Will we remain distant friend that remind each other of "roadside" support? Honestly, I don't know and haven't gotten that far. The most I've gotten are the words on this page and the evaluation of who we once were. Baby step, right? This didn't end with a normal conversation like: 

him: I've been blessed with a second chance and I'm going for it. Wish me luck...

me: You know you have my full support because your happiness is all I care about. Make the best of each new moment and give it all you got. I'll be praying for you both...

him: Thank you Beautiful! You're a good woman and I know you'll be found by "The One". Take care of yourself...

me: You do the same! 

It hasn't gone down like that and no one can expect it to. It was more of a popular sighting on all of the social media post and I concluded my crush was ending. So, there you have it...my crush is possibly getting the second chance he deserves and I'm back to figuring out my purpose for future relationships. I'm trying this new approach of just focusing on my career and letting God write my relationship blog post. It seems like I have a few unfinished posts and I think I deserve a chance to have a post that I'm proud to call my very own...

BTW...
I think I found my "pen" for writing again...let's see what happens!

1 comment:

  1. Very nice and interesting read. I loved the 2-3 lane scenarios you gave and I couldn’t agree with you more. Sometimes during this journey we tend to think things will end up one way but turn out God will have a completely different plan for us. You never know what’s ahead while you drive down this 2 or 3 lane highways. As you’re driving only look in your rearview mirror as needed-Don’t stay focused on the past too long or you’ll drive off the road. Also, pay attention to the SIGNS as you travel, (he will not bring you to something w/o preparing you first) knowing that what God has for you is just for you , therefore if you see that a detour is ahead-that’s okay, try not to complain or fret about it. You never know, on that very road is where you might be found. Just know that your King awaits you and until HE FINDS YOU, just keep driving forward and enjoy the scenery!
    QOTG

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